"Put that down!" "Stop that!" Don't touch anything!" "Leave that alone!" When I think about the imperatives of my childhood, it seems like they were mostly related to touching things and bothering people. "Just sit down and be quiet!" was the most often combination of imperatives. "Do not bother people or break their property" was the message conveyed by adults of all ilks. I mostly didn't break things, but I was never good at sitting still. It is still a spiritual discipline for me, to sit quietly and not move when other people are talking. Although I don't actually buy into the "Disorder" part of my ADD, I do have to admit to the "Attention Deficit;" I have trouble attending to things I am not interested in. Still, I know an imperative when I see it, and I was raised to be a good girl. So I try to obey.
Do you know the imperative I spend the most time on, in every field of my life? "Do not be afraid." I say it more, I think it more, I advocate for it more than any other single thing in my life. It is in front of "Get your work done," in front of "Be nice," and (only slightly) ahead of "Do not eat my cookie." I think we forget that "Do not be afraid" comes at us, consistently, in the imperative form of the verb. For those of you who are not grammar nerds, in other languages, such as the Hebrew and Greek in which our scripture was originally written, verb tenses and meanings are formed with endings or prefixes, changed spellings or added letters. For example, when Jesus says, "Fear them not" in Matthew 10, referring to those who would persecute the disciples, the word phobeo becomes phobethente--the imperative. A command. In English it is easy to spot because of the "understood 'You'" in the sentence. the verb now moved to the front of the line. "(YOU) Pick up your dadgummed socks off the dining room table!" "(YOU) Feed that dog before he eats the baby!" "(YOU) Do not be afraid!"
Right now, everyone is afraid. How could we not be afraid? We are pummeled by an invisible enemy, which can catch us or anyone around us without our even knowing it has caught us. We can pass it to someone else without knowing we have it. It can have mild symptoms, no symptoms, or life-ending symptoms. It is brand new, but we know what it is. We will find a vaccine for it, but not for a good while. Our only defense is to give up many things that are familiar and comforting to us. Meanwhile there is too much bad information floating around and lots and lots and lots of fear.
So here is a question: why would one of THE MOST CONSISTENT commands in scripture be about not being afraid? I mean, we get why we should not steal, shouldn't take someone else's wife or donkey (does the omission of stealing or coveting someone else's husband strike anyone as a fairly big loophole?). Why the constant nagging about being afraid? Why can't I be afraid if I want to? Well, it's kind of like the rabbit I walked past coming into the office this morning. She was about 20 yards away, sitting with her little ears up in the morning sunlight. She sensed me coming, and lowered her ears. I'm sure she tensed her muscles. Her heart--already beating at quite a clip--sped up and she prepared to run. I am no threat to her--I would never intentionally hurt a rabbit, because I read Watership Down, but she doesn't know that. So she spends her energy on preparing to run. She hunkers down, as if I could not still see her. What logic she might possess is gone in that moment and she is running on pure instinct, which, in this case, hasn't really served her well, using up her energy for a nothing threat like me.
Fear is a survival instinct. It keeps us alive. Except, because it is instinctual, it by-passes our higher brain functions--it leaves logic behind. So, here's my theory of what scripture is commanding, what it is imperative that we do when fear is at work on us. I believe the actual command might be this: "Use your brain." There are moments when that instinct of fear-based reactions is vital--someone pointing a loaded gun at our face; someone threatening physical violence. For most of our lives, though, we are better served by our brains, by taking a moment and pulling back from the fear, by removing the permission from ourselves to spiral, and saying to ourselves, possibly out loud, "Keep it together, Weirdo Who Is Now Talking To Herself--Use Your Brain."
Right now, more than any other time in my lifetime, we have an entire world afraid. We are afraid of the virus. We are afraid of each other. We are afraid of what world leaders will do or not do. We are afraid of what violent people around us might do in a vacuum of power. We are afraid for our systems, for our communities, for our very survival. And it shows. Social media has become more of a battleground than it ever was, every day individuals setting themselves up as journalists to share a version of the world that they call truth, despite evidence that might offer a different view. Every day, individuals calling out others, pointing out the villains, blaming, angry, even calling for violence and death. I want to say it right now--based on the life of Jesus and every other person who has been close to God, that is not ok. It is not ok to wish for the death of someone, even if that person is making mistakes that hurt others. It is not ok to wish for the death of those who are acting in fear. Anger is an element of fear and we are an angry, fearful people. And, if you want to know what the Bible says about that, it says this, over and over: "Do not be afraid." In the imperative mood. A command. "Put that down." "Stop it." "Do not take one more step." "Don't be afraid."
So how do we respond to the things around us that are problematic? What should we say when our leaders make mistakes that cost lives? When they double down on their own fear? I'd like to recommend a couple of things:
1.Calling out mistakes and calling for good practices is not a fear response. It is rational and what should be happening broadly right now. It isn't helpful to make this about personalities. It is helpful to make it about good policies, good practices.
2.The one person we each can control is the self. If I read (as I have) that social distancing, hand-washing and mask-wearing are very effective in preventing the spread of the disease, I can do those things. I cannot control what other people do--it is pointless to talk about what other people do. I can model good practices. That's it. The rest is fear and control, neither of which is helpful right now. If I have a business or an organization, I can work with my colleagues to set good practices and enforce them. If people want my services, they can abide by my practices. If not, ok. I cannot control them, but my organization can control its own policies.
3. Recognizing fear and fear responses gives me some power over my fear. To say, "I am afraid," right now is not only to acknowledge it for myself, but also to acknowledge it for those around me. Speaking our fears engages those higher brain functions--we hear the words, we understand them, we see them for what they are. I am afraid, and it is making me angry. I am afraid, and it is shutting down my thoughts. I am afraid and I need to do something, to say something, to act so that this feeling goes away. Begin with the words: "I am afraid." Remove the permissions to spiral. Talk to friends. Listen to friends acknowledge their own fears. Reach out beyond your usual circles and let people vent without blaming them for venting.
You know the other thing scripture has to say about fear? It says, "Be strong and courageous." It says, "Go boldly out in the world with the knowledge that God is with you." It is filled with stories of ne'er-do-wells who had God on their side and triumphed against all odds. The people are thirsty in the desert, and God brings them water. The people are hungry in the desert and God gives them food. The people are sick and weak and afraid and mentally ill and in broken relationships and hurting themselves and others and Jesus heals them. We are called to require of ourselves that we be brave. There is no way around that call. Try as you might, you will not find a scripture that says, "Give in to your fears and vent against people you don't agree with." It may feel good to laugh at the people who are doing it all wrong, to make fun of them and have others agree that they are the problem. But that is a fear response, an anger response. And it isn't helpful right now. Be brave. Be hopeful. Be courageous. Love is bold and all those people who post Beatles tunes and espouse a world of love should also acknowledge that love is brave and does not attack out of fear.
I am afraid right now. I spend some time, every day, in fear. I am afraid of what might happen to my family. What might happen to my community. What might happen to my children, my husband, me. I am afraid. And some days, the push of that fear behind my eyes is more than I can bear. But I am fortunate in my life that I have good friends. I have strong family. I have a place I can voice my fears. And I have (at the risk of sounding churchy) Jesus; I have God. I have scripture. I have a deeply entrenched belief system that tells me that God walks with us in the world right now, as God has walked through plagues and wars and violence before. I do better when I listen to God. I do better when I voice my fears to friends, when we commiserate and laugh and think of creative ways to get through all of this. We have resources and this is the right time to use them. I hear the command, "Don't be afraid; use your brain; use your resources; be creative; be hopeful; be loving; be hospitable." The alternative does not serve us well. We have been told how we are to be, and it is imperative that we do so.
